Church of Kirk

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:24:39 — 58.1MB)

SuperKirk got sick, and lives to tell the tale.  RC Kitten goes back to the vet.  Moron muslims that, by murdering people over a burned book, prove that the book is worthless horse shit, and an unworthy life philosophy for the human race.  Will SpaceX save us?  Cousin Brian is the Insurance King.  Buffalo attacks could happen to YOU.  SuperKirk soloed, and it rules.  Just one news story this week, so more entertainment for your podcast listening dollar.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:37:27 — 66.9MB)

SuperKirk reviews Faulty Towers: Waldorf Salad, Tom the weatherman from Hawaii, Mark’s reverse trend in musical tastes, Gary Numan/UFO theory as to the origins of Exile out of thin air, SuperKirk tears apart Obamas’s State of the Union speech (for what seems like hours), The case that Steve Jobs is simply a (dead) criminal magician, a brothel token for next birthday?

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:53:38 — 78.0MB)

The 20th anniversary of Dream Theater’s masterpiece: Images and Words, and SuperKirk fondly remembers his first listen.  RC the cat, gets to take a trip to the vet, and he doesn’t have a good time.  Who made Sisi the cat police, and why does she have an arrest warrant for RC kitten?  Did Cousin Brian buy a gay Kindle book? Is God the most prolific abortion doctor?

News:  A white trash flaming tampon attack on car; Dude eats a free range cat, gets an omega-3 boost, but then gets arrested, but for what?; Mexican bank robber that they won’t make a movie about; Kansas doesn’t believe in evolution or radiation; New York heroes versus the opossum.

Plus a Val Kilmer movie recommendation.

So listen to this podcast, and I think you’ll agree:  Hellmann’s is a hell of a mayonnaise.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:05:24 — 44.9MB)

It’s MIKE KING Day, and SuperKirk celebrates his 40th anniversary, and tells about his “wild and crazy” birthday bash that happened over the weekend.  How you can tell you and all of your friends have transitioned into old people land.  Speculation on the 2013 remake of “The Boy in the Plastic Bubble”.  Can a Marine pee all the way into Muslim Heaven?  If you find a gun in a prisoner’s ass, (but the gun isn’t loaded), who put it there?

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:28:43 — 60.9MB)

Today my special guest is SuperKirk.  90 minutes worth of Church of Kirk and there are NO news stories!  I tell the cautionary tale of a French press and some misplaced green tea.  The scary tale of Pee Man at the Half Priced Book Store.  Then I tell you why you should fuck Facebook.  I celebrate Stephen Hawking’s birthday and his wondrously twitching cheek, and share my theory that Steve could possibly have an average I.Q.  Then you get some excellent Netflix streaming movie recommendations, including Office Space, Memphis Belle, The Winnebago Man,   Best Boy, and Idiocracy.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 31:17 — 21.5MB)

SuperKirk kicks off 2012 with special guest:  Slade the Cricket enthusiast.  If you missed Slade’s first Church of Kirk appearance, check out THIS podcast.  Slade could only podcast for 30 minutes, because he had a cricket match to watch.  The answer to Slade’s question to me was:  The death of Steve Jobs.  This is the only correct answer, and I don’t know why I didn’t think of it while we were recording the podcast, but there you go.  The death of Steve Jobs.  2011 wasn’t complete shit after all.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:28:30 — 60.8MB)

Today’s special guest: Shawn the Poker Player.  Hey liberals, Obama shot down the morning after pill, and SuperKirk is really pissed off.  Here’s some “common sense” for you all, no bullshit Washington condescending election season hijacking of the English language required!  Next up:  A rant about SNL and the failings of head writer Seth Meyers.  Wall-street at the Waterfront jack-offs, that even the union bosses are getting sick of.  TIME Magazine no longer knows what “person of the year” means, unless they are trying to go head to head with THE ONION.  Committees being worthless, case in point, “Kansas: As Big as You Think”.  Cancel your Egypt vacation plans, unless you are a democracy hating religious nut job.  We live in a country where at least ONE PERCENT of all vehicles on the public roadways ARE NOT BEING PILOTED because some of you assholes are updating Facebook when you should be trying your best to NOT kill that family of five in the lane next to you.  If you DO get injured by a texting driver, you might not want to get any medical work done in India.  A kick ass story about THE BRAZILIAN CORN HEIST off a MOVING friggin train!  And much more.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 50:49 — 34.9MB)

SuperKirk goes to his first KU basketball game, and tells all.  Huge rant about stupid middle aged white guys that are “High Five Whores”.  Black people will never have equality or justice or anything as long as there is a ban on white tattoo ink.  Are 80 year old ladies with colostomy bags the new face of terrorism in the sky?  SuperKirk’s Einsteinian concept of medical doctors teaming up with the TSA.  And SuperKirk defends Neil Patrick Harris and his right to use the word TRANNY whenever the hell he wants too.